Poachers

Bill was a millwright at work and he was raised on a small farm near the town of Escanaba, in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. Bill was one tough sucker and when sober and since he had been on the wagon for a long time, he was a great guy. He and I spent a lot of time Bass fishing together and the story’s just rolled off the guy. I wish he were still alive because he had a way of telling a story that just had you rolling on the floor. He could recite the Lords Prayer and have you rolling on the floor. What a guy.

He said he had a couple brothers and they were raised on a farm. There was a big swamp on the property with a riprap road running through it. The road was built, many years ago, to get to the back of their property. It was built across a big bog and what they did was lay logs crossways, all along the route, and then dumped dirt and such on them. It took a lot of logs but I guess there were plenty when they cleared the land. Many roads are still built this way in logging areas. It takes a lot of logs and it might be 4 or 5 logs thick.

This road was dead-ended and rarely used any more. I guess they had a lot of property and where the road came off the country road was a half-mile down the road or so. Their property went about a mile deep or so, from the way he told it.

They had problems occasionally when poachers would take this road at night and shoot deer off their property.

A little about Bill. Bill was a good friend but when he had been drinking he was much like Dan’s kin. He was gonna fight something. If he was in a bar he picked a dang fight and if nobody else was in there but you and him, you were the target. He didn’t lose many fights either but he didn’t care much either way. Bill went crazy in later years but I will save that for another time. He and I used to fish Bass once or twice a week and were good friends. I had never seen him drink as he had gone on the wagon but for some reason we stopped at a bar to get a burger. He fell off the wagon that day and there was nobody there but me and him and the bartender. I had heard the stories about Bills habits so watched him. He did get a little mouthy with me, as I was the only one in the bar but I told him if he did not settle down, we were quits. He settled down but wanted to fight. I sure the hell didn’t want to fight the sucker but had a pool cue in mind if it came to that.

Now you know Bill. Bill said that he and one of his brothers had been out drinking and had come home. Bars close at 2 am so it must have been after that. They were growed boys but their pa still held rein over them and they came in quiet like.

Something woke one of them and when they looked out back, they saw lights moving on the back of their property.. They knew it was the local poachers and got pissed. They had just been drinking with the guys, just that night and had always had an agreement that they would stay off each other’s property.

Drunk as they were, they decided to do something about it. They get up and dragging their britches on , headed out the door. It was a dark, starlight night and they could hear the distant noise of the beat up old truck as the poachers slowly moved along the two track. It was hard for the poachers to be absolutely quiet because the truck they were driving was a beat up old piece of crap and there was a bunch of muffled clanking and banging as the thing made its slow way down the road. Them being drunk didn’t help either I don’t imagine. The poachers that is. Bill and brother could see the light flashing off the distant trees and the drunken poachers looked for the tell tale sign of the deer’s eyes, in the dark night.

Bill and brother headed for the barn, where the old pickup truck they drove was parked. Bill said he grabbed a ball bat but the brother had a better idea. He headed to the back of the barn and came back with a box of dynamite. They used it on the farm for blowing stumps and such. The old man was the one that did the blowing but hell, hey had watched him a time or two, hadn’t they? Bill said there was a few sticks shy of a box but they were not sure how many it would take, so they took the whole box.

They got some fuses, I don’t know anything about using the stuff but it was the type you used a battery to set off. They looked around for some electrical wire and Bill grabbed a small roll that was hanging on a nail on the shed wall and a roll of duct tape. They figured they would use the trucks battery to set it off, as pa had done.

They tossed it in the back of the truck and a snorting and giggling at the thought of the great trick they were gonna pull on the poachers, set off quietly for the two track. Bills Brother jumped behind the wheel and Bill started pushing the truck out of the barn. They did not want to wake pa. When they got a ways from the house, Bill jumped in and off they went.

Like I said, it was a very dark night and they did not want to tip off the poachers. They had to drive with the lights off and sorta feel the way down the two track. It was bumpier than heck and since it was through a big swamp, it was a bit wet in places.

They were worried that the poachers would be coming back so they only went a hundred yards or so down the road. Bill got out and his brother cut the motor



Bill Smith was his name. Bill stepped out of the truck and just stood there. It was as black as a yard up a bulls arse and very quiet. He could hear the truck up ahead and he could still see it was moving away. He then started hearing the critters and Bill, being as tough as he was, ain’t no dang critter guy. He was the type that was terrified of rats too.

He said he stood there and listened to the bullfrogs and insects. It was swamp on both sides, as I said and the water was a couple feet deep, as he told it. There were snakes of course but the rats is what worried him.

His brother told him to get it done before the poachers came back their way, which was the only way to go of course. Bill said, “Get what done?” as they were a litte slow on the planning. They just knew that there should be something the could do with the dinomite to discourage the bad guys.

His brother said, “What the hell! Blow up the road!!” Hell, made sense to old Bill! Stiring paint with his tallywacker made sense to Bill when he was drunk so he went to the box in the back of the truck.. “How much should I use?” says he to the equally drunk bro. “Hell, use it all!” says he. Now Bill was not sure that was such a good job but if he had to only use half of it, he would lhave to count it out and it was much easier to just use the whole box, or as much of a box as they had.

Bill asked his brother if he knew how to attach the blasting caps, or what ever they are but the Brother told him no and to figure it out. It was so dang black back there that they could not see to attack the cap so the brother lights a match. I don’t know much about it but that just don’t seem smart to me.

Bill finally got the cap attached and grabbed the roll of wire. He twisted the wires to the cap and carried it to the box that he had sat in the middle of the two track. He had told his brother to turn the truck around so they could make a quick get away. He said the two dang fools were giggling all the time. They were still drunk enough to think it all made sense.

Bill dropped the stick in the box with the rest and then started unrolling the wire and walking back toward the main road, stringing it out as he went. Heck he had not gotten 30 ft or so when he reached the end of the dang wire. I can not remember for sure but what ever it was, in that black night he said he could still see the box!

His brother came backing up the trail to him. Bill said the dang taillights were like beacons and he almost crapped, seeing that drunken sucker backing up that trail with no lights on and the taillights marking his way.

Brother got out and asked if everything was ready. He was really having a hard time containing himself by this time. He could already see it happening! Bill said, “We got a problem” Bro said, “What ?”

Bill said, “Wire too short”

Bro said, “What wire?”

Bill said he thought about knotting the boys head about then. He said, “See that there box of dinomite?” Brother said, “Yeah” Bill said, “You should not be able to you dumbass!”

Well they talked it over and since the battery was under the hood and it was pointed down the road, he told the bro to go back with the truck, turn it around again. They needed all the distance from that dang box of explosive that they could get!

The Brother came driving back up the road again but this time he had the dang head lights on. Dumbass could not keep two thoughts going at the same time it seems. Bill reached in and shut them off as soon as he got up to him. Bill looked off in the directing of the poachers but they were still going away, slowly.

Bill said he walked up to the box and looked back to the truck. He said the wanted to take some of the sticks out but the giggling brother was getting into it again and told him to use them all. They would show them.

Bill, still not thinking clearly, thought it would be smart to put something between that dang box and them, to protect them like. Heck it made sense to him at the time and the Brother was not gonna argue about anything about then.

He saw a stump that was just laying on the ground, off the side of the road. It must have been hauled back there and dumped. Bill and the brother got together and rolled it over to the box and situated it between the truck and the dinomite. Now they were safe. At least in their minds they were safe. Geesh! I have no clue how big that stump was but it was not big enough. The two of them could roll it so it was not all that big.

Brother got in the truck and started it. Bill lifted the hood and with the light from his lighter, found the battery terminals. He said he looked out toward the poachers and it looked like they were working their way back. They must not have seen a deer.

Bills brother said,’Hee hee, doit ! do it ! Do it! There coming!

Bill said he touched the wires to the terminals and all hell cut loose. He said there was an explosion and he was thrown back along side of the dang truck and then there was a loud secondary noise, a hell of a bang, mud and wood and water and probably frogs and snakes and rats a falling all over the place! He looked up at the truck, which he was laying beside and saw that the dang stump had taken the dang hood off the dang truck and was setting half in the cab.

He jumped up and ran to the cab, yelling for his brother, thinking he had taken the stump in the teeth. He yelled again and then the brother popped his head up, grinning like a possum eating crap. Seems he had dove for the floorboards just before the blast had gone off. He looked and grinned, said Bill. He looked at Bill and said, “Dang, it worked like a charm didn’t it?”

Bill was rather shaken up about that time. He could see the lights coming on at the house and yelled to the brother to help him get the dang stump out of the windshield! They had to get out of there. They managed to get the thing loose and jumped in. Steering wheel was all bent to crap and windshield all busted but they were back to laughing again. The brother tried to start the truck and it started. Something was going right. He turned on the headlights and saw what had happened. Ain’t nobody driving down that road no more. Now I don’t know how big that dang old hole was but Bill said the whole road was just gone! The way he told me it was gone from swamp to swamp. He said there was at least 25 ft of it taken out.

They started a laughing again but soon saw the lights a bouncing their direction. They decided that since those poachers were armed and Bill and Brother were dun out of ammo, it was time to get. They would have to come back another day to find their hood, now was not the time for that.

Back they went to the country road and into the drive. The lights from the poachers truck were still a coming but they had no fear that they would be catching up any time soon.

They pulled nto the barn where their old man was a waiting. Really pissed he was but the boys, sobered up a mite by now, told him what had happened. The old man told them to get to bed and they would talk about it in the morning.

I don’t know what happened after that but I asked Bill what happened to the poachers and he just said the road was never rebuilt and the old poachers truck was still back there.

Bill died a long time ago but was an amazing guy, when he was sober.

He was crazy when he died though